Thanksgiving Comes First

5

A couple of days ago, a blogging acquaintance of mine – Suldog – approached me to once again participate in his annual Thanksgiving Comes First campaign (see my past entries here and here). Last year’s contribution was fairly serious and straightforward. My 2007 rant was a tad obscene. Both invoked the images of vomiting elves.

THIS year I wrote a li’l poem. But I’m still including the regurgitating elves. For your questionable reading pleasure:

Starbucks now pours their java in cups that are red,
and I cringe just to think of what else is ahead.
It’s early November, so I expect the worst,
because no one remembers THANKSGIVING COMES FIRST.

I walk into the drugstore and notice the shelves
look very much like they’ve been puked on by elves.
I stand there quite flummoxed, and I sputter and curse.
Why will no one acknowledge THANKSGIVING COMES FIRST?

“But what do you have against Christmas?” friends wail,
“It’s so pretty to look at! So much is on sale!”
I don’t disagree; but their bubbles I’ll burst
by reminding them all that THANKSGIVING COMES FIRST.

Thanksgiving Comes First

2

Look, I am a total chump for Christmas. I take a nearly insane amount of pride in my dope mad decoration skillz. I bawl like a Bieber fan at most of the animated specials. The Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack kills me every single time. And don’t get me started on Andy Williams.

I love Christmas, because at my very core, I am squishy and sparkly and sentimental. I’m not even particularly religious, but I get that the earlier the ads and decorations come out, the more it cheapens the actual day for those who ARE. At the very least, by the time December 25th gets here, we’re all very, very tired of it. It shouldn’t be something that we “get through,” but the more we’re inundated by it, the more we’re clobbered over the head with tinsel and peppermint and the infernal flatulent synth of that HORRIBLE Paul McCartney Christmas song, the more all of us feel like it’s an endurance test.

And where’s the love for Thanksgiving? Oh, right – until we find some way of incorporating the purchases of small electronics, slippers, and toys that require a metric buttload of assembly into the dinner itself, it’s pretty much regarded as “the day before Black Friday.” It’s the day the sales inserts outweigh the actual newspaper by 5 to 1. And, well, Thanksgiving decorations just aren’t as SHINY, are they?

But there’s PIE. And high school football. And PIE. And remembering to stop and practice a little gratitude. And PIE. PIE.

Every year for the past several years, Suldog has encouraged blogger types to participate in his Thanksgiving Comes First campaign. We all laugh (and cringe) when retailers start doing the Ho-Ho-Ho Stroll well before Thanksgiving (some places, like Home Depot, start rolling out the lawn decorations as early as Labor Day). It’s hard to avoid places that haven’t already started decking their halls, but I think it’s important to point out, and congratulate, those few places that hold back, no matter what that may do to their bottom line come December 26th.

For example, let’s hear it once again for Nordstrom:

 

(NOTE:  yes, I know this is not from this year, but they continue to stick to their guns.)

I’m remaining cautiously optimistic about Starbucks (or at least the one upstairs from my office). They’ve already started up with their holiday beverages, and are serving them in the tell-tale red cups, but the shop itself thus far does not look as if Santa’s elves have projectile-vomited all over it.

Thanksgiving Comes First. Post something on your own site if you agree (just be sure to let Suldog know by leaving a message at the aforementioned page).